While wasting time researching on Reddit yesterday, I ran across a post titled “The Most Offensive Shoes Ever”, which featured these beauties to the right. This figment of the poster’s imagination is a combination of Uggs + Crocs + and Performa Jane FiveFingers. I agree, the shoes are awful.
While browsing through the comments of that post (which were surprisingly pro-FiveFingers), I ran across a couple of people referencing an episode of ‘Married With Children’ that included a bit about ‘God’s Shoes’. I pulled up a video of it and was struck by how similar ‘God’s Shoes’ and FiveFingers looked.
In the episode, Al Bundy meets God and is blown away by his shoes. When returning back to his senses, he makes it his life’s work to remake these shoes. His commandments for the shoes are:
- Thou shalt have shoes with toes stitched in
- Thou shalt have socks attacheth to yan shoes
- And thou shalt have a lot of other stuff that will come forth with
Checkout the video (see the shoes as 1:41). So basically Al Bundy & God collaborated to create FiveFingers. Sounds about right.
Corey
January 13th, 2012 at 9:56 am
It’s not the Uggs+Crocs that makes those offensive. It’s the inclusion of Nickelback.
Brian Patterson
January 13th, 2012 at 10:00 am
haha, basically. The original redditor posted the shoes sans-Nickelback, but then someone replied and said “those aren’t the most offensive, these are” and attached the same shoes with the Nickelback cover slapped on. Made me LOL.
Derek Walsh
January 13th, 2012 at 11:50 am
That’s Al Bundy. Ted Bundy was a serial killer.
Brian Patterson
January 13th, 2012 at 11:53 am
Good catch, not sure what I was thinking there. Its fixed
Terral
January 14th, 2012 at 12:42 am
That is awesome! The video gave me a good laugh.